"When we're broken we like to believe that if maybe someone just hugs us tight enough we'd be put back together." -Rebeca Ruiz, Broken Perfectly (out soon).
As humans, we are not invincible. We are not immortal, we are just mortal. It doesn't take much to break us, and I just don't mean physically.
I am almost done writing Broken Perfectly (it finally has a title) and it has made me learn so much about myself.
Often people ask me why I have such dark writing, and if I need some mental help. Because what kind of person writes about heartbreak, or car accidents with near death experiences, or suicide, or rape victims, or death?
I write about these people because these people exist. Not just in my head but in the real world.
I know that there are people in the world going through heartbreak, dealing with a loss of a loved one, post traumatic stress disorders, depression, suicide attempts, or just surviving whatever they are going through. They are all out there.
I do my best to do my research, make sure I get everything right, making sure I get their stories right.
I have known people to suffer through depression and convince themselves that they are okay. I have known people who isolate themselves for fear of being hurt, and push people who love them away.
I have known someone to take their life because they were just so sad on the inside, I have almost been that person.
My characters thoughts sometimes come from me and what I was feeling when I was eleven until I was sixteen.
If there's something I want my readers to take from my writing is that everyone deserves a happy ending. It will come in it's own time, you just have to keep going.
It doesn't matter if you're a 'broken person' because broken people eventually find the person who will keep them together, that will help those wounds heal. Maybe it will be a boyfriend/girlfriend, maybe it will be your best friend, maybe it will be a stranger that you meet for one night.
There's no such thing as too broken in my book. You are who you are for a reason, and therefore broken perfectly.
Broken Perfectly will be out soon, it's a continuation of Broken Pleasure, Ryder and Scarlett's story. Here is a little summary, some spoilers!:
Ryder and Scarlett are both engaged. Not to each other. To other people that they have decided to commit to.
Willow's wedding is bringing up old feelings and issues that were never dealt with. Keep in mind, Scarlett is only in town for a few days, then she's running back to her home back South.
Will they finally have their happily ever after, or will more heartbreak and fear keep them apart?
xxRebeca
Showing posts with label first accident. Show all posts
Showing posts with label first accident. Show all posts
Friday, September 25, 2015
Tuesday, August 11, 2015
Music is the reason I write.
I can remember ever since I was little that I have always loved music. I mean, who didn't?
I grew up in a Mexican household which meant music was always playing when we woke up, when we cleaned, and especially when we had social gatherings. Spanish music always has a story to tell, they were descriptive and allowed my imagination to flow.
I kind of moved away from spanish music, and I started getting into my own music. Kelly Clarkson, Britney Spears, NSYNC, and many more.
In my head, I could create stories, stories I would dream about at night. I liked to sing (even though I was terrible at it) and I liked pretending to be the lead of my stories inside my head. My imagination was wild.
The first time I wrote was after reading Twilight in middle school. I think I was in eighth grade. I wrote and wrote, at least I tried. I wrote in complete silence because that's how my neighbor wrote her amazing stories.
I wanted to write amazing stories, too. Like the ones in my head that I got while listening to music. I didn't write for a long time after that because I thought I wasn't good enough. Every story I tried to write just ended with me saving it and never looking at it again because I got blocked.
One day, while listening to Thriving Ivory, I was driving to my friends house to pick her up to go to class, I just had this story pop in my head. I remember grabbing my phone and opening the voice recording app, and I recorded myself just saying words.
I didn't really have a story. I had an idea. I still remember the words that I thought of that day. Car accident. Coma. Scarred body. College. Unhappiness. Save Me.
I could even imagine the place where the car accident happened, I had a place in my town that inspired it.
This all happened before I wrote my first book. I pushed the idea aside, and I'm glad I did because it really let me think about it for about a year. Scarlett and Ryder talked to me in dreams, they developed and finally I just had to write about them.
I wrote about them with a few songs in mind, including the song Unhappy by Thriving Ivory, one of my favorite bands.
Now I don't write without a music playlist. Music helps my imagination, it helps me write, and I absolutely love it. Sometimes I'll write a scene with one song on repeat just so I don't lose idea in my mind.
Now, talking about Scarlett and Ryder...I released Broken Pleasure last month, and I am very proud of it, though the idea of anybody reading it makes me feel ill. I did get my first review on it a few weeks ago, and you can get it here.
I hope you guys like it(:
xxRebeca
I grew up in a Mexican household which meant music was always playing when we woke up, when we cleaned, and especially when we had social gatherings. Spanish music always has a story to tell, they were descriptive and allowed my imagination to flow.
I kind of moved away from spanish music, and I started getting into my own music. Kelly Clarkson, Britney Spears, NSYNC, and many more.
In my head, I could create stories, stories I would dream about at night. I liked to sing (even though I was terrible at it) and I liked pretending to be the lead of my stories inside my head. My imagination was wild.
The first time I wrote was after reading Twilight in middle school. I think I was in eighth grade. I wrote and wrote, at least I tried. I wrote in complete silence because that's how my neighbor wrote her amazing stories.
I wanted to write amazing stories, too. Like the ones in my head that I got while listening to music. I didn't write for a long time after that because I thought I wasn't good enough. Every story I tried to write just ended with me saving it and never looking at it again because I got blocked.
One day, while listening to Thriving Ivory, I was driving to my friends house to pick her up to go to class, I just had this story pop in my head. I remember grabbing my phone and opening the voice recording app, and I recorded myself just saying words.
I didn't really have a story. I had an idea. I still remember the words that I thought of that day. Car accident. Coma. Scarred body. College. Unhappiness. Save Me.
I could even imagine the place where the car accident happened, I had a place in my town that inspired it.
This all happened before I wrote my first book. I pushed the idea aside, and I'm glad I did because it really let me think about it for about a year. Scarlett and Ryder talked to me in dreams, they developed and finally I just had to write about them.
I wrote about them with a few songs in mind, including the song Unhappy by Thriving Ivory, one of my favorite bands.
Now I don't write without a music playlist. Music helps my imagination, it helps me write, and I absolutely love it. Sometimes I'll write a scene with one song on repeat just so I don't lose idea in my mind.
Now, talking about Scarlett and Ryder...I released Broken Pleasure last month, and I am very proud of it, though the idea of anybody reading it makes me feel ill. I did get my first review on it a few weeks ago, and you can get it here.
I hope you guys like it(:
xxRebeca
Wednesday, May 27, 2015
Inspiration
Music is where I get most of my inspiration. I know some writers HATE listening to music while writing because it makes them distracted, but not me.
I thrive from tunes coming from my headphones. Sometimes I just need something to keep me still long enough on my computer to actually write a scene. Other times, it just fits the plot so perfectly that it sends me into a frenzy to write before I can forget everything!
I have a playlist on my Spotify where I can just press shuffle and any music coming at me I can write to. If you would like to listen to that playlist, you can press here.
My music doesn't fit every scene I write, but it sure does keep me thinking about what could be.
Well, today I wrote this thing for my new book that's coming out July 12th! I'm using a new technique to write my book, first writing half of Scarlett's chapters, and then working on Ryders. This is what came from Ryder today:
I thrive from tunes coming from my headphones. Sometimes I just need something to keep me still long enough on my computer to actually write a scene. Other times, it just fits the plot so perfectly that it sends me into a frenzy to write before I can forget everything!
I have a playlist on my Spotify where I can just press shuffle and any music coming at me I can write to. If you would like to listen to that playlist, you can press here.
My music doesn't fit every scene I write, but it sure does keep me thinking about what could be.
Well, today I wrote this thing for my new book that's coming out July 12th! I'm using a new technique to write my book, first writing half of Scarlett's chapters, and then working on Ryders. This is what came from Ryder today:
“Well I have had to work hard in my life, it hasn’t always been kind to me.”
“Life making you go through obstacles is being kind to you because only those who struggle know true happiness.” Her eyes widened at my deep words.
“How can you have such a good outlook in life? Not every college senior has their life together like you.”
“Trust me, sweetheart, I don’t have my life together. I have a few pieces and for now I’m content with that.” I watched as she bit her bottom lip, thinking about what I’ve said.
“You should be a motivational speaker if being a surgeon doesn’t pan out.” I laugh.
“I’ll make a note of that.”
I hope you guys liked that, I know I enjoyed writing that. (:
Take care,
Rebeca x
Wednesday, January 7, 2015
Another car incident...
It officially feels like winter. Tomorrow will be day two of severe cold conditions, everything is freezing and no one wants to even go outside to warm up their car.
So...it snowed on Monday night..I guess. I had two days off, and I usually just get as much sleep as I possibly can because I work for three days straight for seven hours every night, and then I don't go to bed until four, then I wake up early to get ready for work.
Anyway, back to my story.
I had driven to my friends house, and I realized that my car was sliding whenever I would drive over snow. This is my second year driving in the winter, and I thought "Well, I'm a pro now, I can handle everything."
HAHAHA. Big fucking mistake.
We went to the mall where I went to get my second cartilage piercing, and I was driving back to drop my friend off.
That's when everything went to shit. First of all, I could barely see in front of me because my liquid that cleans my windshield wiper was completely frozen and would only throw out small spurts of it on the windshield, not enough to clean it.
Second, I had to go through suicide circle, this roundabout where I live. I was fine, and I even made it past it before I had to do this small curved turn.
That's when I lost complete control of my car, and to be honest I don't really remember it. All I could remember was that I didn't want to hit these two poles.
There was one pole that I was trying to avoid, and while trying to avoid it, my car slid onto the curb and I almost hit the big pole, you know, the ones with all the wires coming out of it, connected to other big poles?
But my car stopped. Thank god.
I never felt such relief. Then the panic began to set in. I was not going to die, and we were fine, but now my car was stuck in the middle of a snow pile. Halfway in the snow, halfway on the street.
I thought I was going to have to call the police, get somebody to pull it out with a tow truck. We were getting ready to call my friends brother to come help us when this kind stranger came up to my window, his wife or girlfriend saw the whole thing go down.
He asked if I needed help, they had watched me struggle trying to get out of the snow pile. I was pressing the gas pedal in reverse, but my car wasn't budging.
I got out of the car, and let him figure out how to get my car out. I watched for a few minutes, and he had managed to get it halfway out, but I was still pretty stuck.
He told me to get back in my car and press the pedal in reverse and he was going to push. I did as told, and WAHLAA(?)! My car reversed out into the street.
I thanked him, and then he literally went off in his car. I wish I could have thanked him properly with like free pizza, I work in a pizzeria, or something.
That was how my Tuesday went. Now I'm sitting all cuddled up in my blankets because it's negative two outside, probably four now, and the wind chill is like negative fifteen.
I hate winter.
Stay safe out there you guys.
xxRebeca
So...it snowed on Monday night..I guess. I had two days off, and I usually just get as much sleep as I possibly can because I work for three days straight for seven hours every night, and then I don't go to bed until four, then I wake up early to get ready for work.
Anyway, back to my story.
I had driven to my friends house, and I realized that my car was sliding whenever I would drive over snow. This is my second year driving in the winter, and I thought "Well, I'm a pro now, I can handle everything."
HAHAHA. Big fucking mistake.
We went to the mall where I went to get my second cartilage piercing, and I was driving back to drop my friend off.
That's when everything went to shit. First of all, I could barely see in front of me because my liquid that cleans my windshield wiper was completely frozen and would only throw out small spurts of it on the windshield, not enough to clean it.
Second, I had to go through suicide circle, this roundabout where I live. I was fine, and I even made it past it before I had to do this small curved turn.
That's when I lost complete control of my car, and to be honest I don't really remember it. All I could remember was that I didn't want to hit these two poles.
There was one pole that I was trying to avoid, and while trying to avoid it, my car slid onto the curb and I almost hit the big pole, you know, the ones with all the wires coming out of it, connected to other big poles?
But my car stopped. Thank god.
I never felt such relief. Then the panic began to set in. I was not going to die, and we were fine, but now my car was stuck in the middle of a snow pile. Halfway in the snow, halfway on the street.
I thought I was going to have to call the police, get somebody to pull it out with a tow truck. We were getting ready to call my friends brother to come help us when this kind stranger came up to my window, his wife or girlfriend saw the whole thing go down.
He asked if I needed help, they had watched me struggle trying to get out of the snow pile. I was pressing the gas pedal in reverse, but my car wasn't budging.
I got out of the car, and let him figure out how to get my car out. I watched for a few minutes, and he had managed to get it halfway out, but I was still pretty stuck.
He told me to get back in my car and press the pedal in reverse and he was going to push. I did as told, and WAHLAA(?)! My car reversed out into the street.
I thanked him, and then he literally went off in his car. I wish I could have thanked him properly with like free pizza, I work in a pizzeria, or something.
That was how my Tuesday went. Now I'm sitting all cuddled up in my blankets because it's negative two outside, probably four now, and the wind chill is like negative fifteen.
I hate winter.
Stay safe out there you guys.
xxRebeca
Thursday, September 25, 2014
My First Car Accident.
I've been driving with a license for almost a year. Not once had I ever gotten into an accident while driving, I am the most careful driver ever. I pull over if I need to call someone or text, or I wait until a red light to take a bite of my food. I am the driver that lets people pass and I follow the speed limit, and I never tailgate.
I often drop my sister off at school and today I decided to take the long way back since the parking lot was full with parents who were in a hurry, and weren't going to let me turn a certain direction because of the long line.
I live right next to the school, and I ended up right in front of the biggest parking lot, and they stop traffic there to allow cars to come in and out. The police handle the traffic there especially because a lot of kids walk to school.
I took my sausage mcmuffin out of the bag and I took two bites. I put it down on the seat and was getting ready to start going, the car in front of me was being a bit slow. When suddenly, I felt my car get hit, and my car moved forward along with my body.
It took me a second to realize that I'd just been hit from behind, and I wasn't sure if the person who hit me had been hit as well, and it had become a domino effect or what. I was so angry and I was afraid. I was getting ready to get out and yell at the person, but cars started to beep, so I turned into the school parking lot and had the guy follow me.
Once parked, I realized that it was a high school kid. A junior (he was wearing class colors, juniors are yellow). He looked mortified and I realized that he was just scared like I was. I calmed down and I got out of my car.
I looked at my car, terrified of what I would see, but thankfully it was only a scratch on the paint job, no dent or anything. I didn't even care about the scratch, my bumper paint has been coming off, so I could care less.
he asked me if I was fine, and I was just shaken up like he was. I got his information, and he asked me if I wanted to call the police. I thought, for what? It was a scratch and we're both fine. I told him it was okay, but I had to talk to my dad because I needed to know what he wanted me to do and I had his information in case I wanted to file a police report later.
My dad said as long as I got his information, and the car was fine and I was fine, there was no need to call the police.
So I let the kid go, but not before I asked him what happened, and why did he bump into my car? He seemed to get a bit nervous, and I had a feeling I knew why. He said he moved his foot off the brake, and didn't realize it because he was trying to find a way into the parking lot.
He got distracted.
We all get distracted. We're all human and we make mistakes I understand that. But distracted driving accounts for a lot of accidents nowadays. Check out these statistics I got from Distraction.gov
But, because text messaging requires visual, manual, and cognitive attention from the driver, it is by far the most alarming distraction.
Five seconds is the average time your eyes are off the road while texting. When traveling at 55mph, that's enough time to cover the length of a football field blindfolded.
That last statistic is the one that scares me the most. The fact that people text and drive, is just completely terrifying for me.
When I drive, I put my phone in my bag on the passenger seat. I know there are apps that stop you from texting and driving, and now the insurance companies have rules about it, and also it is very illegal (at least in Illinois) to be on your phone while driving.
There are also many organizations that bring awareness to what texting and driving can do. A text is not worth your life. The text can wait. Please think about it the next time you get a text while driving, don't look at your phone.
- Rebeca x
I often drop my sister off at school and today I decided to take the long way back since the parking lot was full with parents who were in a hurry, and weren't going to let me turn a certain direction because of the long line.
I live right next to the school, and I ended up right in front of the biggest parking lot, and they stop traffic there to allow cars to come in and out. The police handle the traffic there especially because a lot of kids walk to school.
I took my sausage mcmuffin out of the bag and I took two bites. I put it down on the seat and was getting ready to start going, the car in front of me was being a bit slow. When suddenly, I felt my car get hit, and my car moved forward along with my body.
It took me a second to realize that I'd just been hit from behind, and I wasn't sure if the person who hit me had been hit as well, and it had become a domino effect or what. I was so angry and I was afraid. I was getting ready to get out and yell at the person, but cars started to beep, so I turned into the school parking lot and had the guy follow me.
Once parked, I realized that it was a high school kid. A junior (he was wearing class colors, juniors are yellow). He looked mortified and I realized that he was just scared like I was. I calmed down and I got out of my car.
I looked at my car, terrified of what I would see, but thankfully it was only a scratch on the paint job, no dent or anything. I didn't even care about the scratch, my bumper paint has been coming off, so I could care less.
he asked me if I was fine, and I was just shaken up like he was. I got his information, and he asked me if I wanted to call the police. I thought, for what? It was a scratch and we're both fine. I told him it was okay, but I had to talk to my dad because I needed to know what he wanted me to do and I had his information in case I wanted to file a police report later.
My dad said as long as I got his information, and the car was fine and I was fine, there was no need to call the police.
So I let the kid go, but not before I asked him what happened, and why did he bump into my car? He seemed to get a bit nervous, and I had a feeling I knew why. He said he moved his foot off the brake, and didn't realize it because he was trying to find a way into the parking lot.
He got distracted.
We all get distracted. We're all human and we make mistakes I understand that. But distracted driving accounts for a lot of accidents nowadays. Check out these statistics I got from Distraction.gov
Distracted driving is any activity that could divert a person's attention away from the primary task of driving. All distractions endanger driver, passenger, and bystander safety. These types of distractions include:
- Texting
- Using a cell phone or smartphone
- Eating and drinking
- Talking to passengers
- Grooming
- Reading, including maps
- Using a navigation system
- Watching a video
- Adjusting a radio, CD player, or MP3 player
But, because text messaging requires visual, manual, and cognitive attention from the driver, it is by far the most alarming distraction.
Five seconds is the average time your eyes are off the road while texting. When traveling at 55mph, that's enough time to cover the length of a football field blindfolded.
That last statistic is the one that scares me the most. The fact that people text and drive, is just completely terrifying for me.
When I drive, I put my phone in my bag on the passenger seat. I know there are apps that stop you from texting and driving, and now the insurance companies have rules about it, and also it is very illegal (at least in Illinois) to be on your phone while driving.
There are also many organizations that bring awareness to what texting and driving can do. A text is not worth your life. The text can wait. Please think about it the next time you get a text while driving, don't look at your phone.
- Rebeca x
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